Carmichael area resident recalls his career in early television

KCRA-TV art director Bob Miller, right; Don Chandler, assistant art director; and Bob Matsumoto, student trainee, work on a project for a then-upcoming Crystal Cream and Butter Co. commercial, in the 1960s. Photo courtesy of Bob Miller

KCRA-TV art director Bob Miller, right; Don Chandler, assistant art director; and Bob Matsumoto, student trainee, work on a project for a then-upcoming Crystal Cream and Butter Co. commercial, in the 1960s. Photo courtesy of Bob Miller

Editor’s Note: This is part two in a series about local people connected to the early days of television.

In continuing to relate his memories about his career in art, Carmichael area resident Bob Miller said that his involvement in working in television did not end with his employment with KTVU Channel 36 in Stockton. He would become one of the early employees of KOVR Channel 13, which was founded in Stockton, and has a long history of operating in the Sacramento area.
“I was there (at KTVU) for six months, and that was in 1954,” Miller said. “(KTVU) immediately put me on the air. There was a show called ‘Magic Genie,’ and a woman named Jean Hardie did the show. And once a week, I went on the air (on the ‘Magic Genie’ show) and I drew pictures on big sheets of butcher paper (with) lecturer’s chalk. I would draw, for example, Elmer the elephant, and I showed the kids how to draw Elmer using black and white chalk. And then I would tell a story about Elmer. Or it might be Sam the snake or it might be Joe the spider. Kids would send in drawings. We would get anywhere from 800 to 1,000 drawings a week and we would pick 10 winners to be on the show, and we would give them little prizes. We were sponsored by a little toy store in Stockton. I was (at KTVU), then (KOVR) Channel 13 went on the air.”
Miller related his first memory about KOVR, as follows: “The first thing pictured on the air misspelled KOVR. It was spelled KVOR. And, of course, KOVR stood for coverage in those days, seeming they had a signal that [covered Northern California]. It was a huge, huge signal, and that was the idea. But the problem was, it duplicated coverage of stations in the Bay Area – the NBC and CBS outlets and so forth. So, (KOVR) couldn’t get a network. They had for a brief time the DuMont network, which carried the (San Francisco) 49ers, which was not much of a deal in those days. (KOVR) had to curtail their coverage in order to get a decent network.”
After being asked how soon he began working for KOVR following the station’s debut, Miller said, “I was almost brand new (at KOVR). There had been another art director there before I was there. His name was Jens Hendrickson. I don’t recall what the reason was he left the station, and they hired me. If they terminated him, it was possibly because of the situation with the ‘KVOR’ mistake.”
In being only about six months shy of the 60th anniversary of KOVR, its history should be of added interest to locals, especially those who recall the earlier years of the station.
The previously mentioned long range coverage of KOVR was referred to in The Sacramento Union and The Sacramento Bee’s announcements that the station would debut on Sept. 6, 1954.
On the same day, The Union noted: “The Sacramento-San Joaquin valleys get a new TV station today, when KOVR-TV goes on the air at 7 p.m. with its premiere program. The new VHF station, with transmitter atop 4,000-foot Mt. Diablo, 35 miles from its studio, will operate on Channel 13. The debut of KOVR marks the first very high frequency TV station to start operations in the valleys.”
The Union described KOVR’s transmitter tower as “standing 325 feet above Diablo’s peak” and sending out 141,000 watts of signal power. The construction permit for the tower was issued by the Federal Communications Commission in February 1954 and work for the construction of the tower began shortly thereafter.
Prior to KOVR’s first broadcast, it was estimated by A.E. Joscelyn, the station’s manager, that KOVR would eventually have an audience of more than 4 million viewers. It was also reported by The Union that the station’s first program would be viewed by 300,000 people.
The Bee, in its Sept. 6, 1954 edition, noted: “Northern California’s newest television station and one which promises to be seen over the widest area will go on the air tonight with an inaugural live program from the California State Fair and Exposition in Sacramento.”
At that time, the 55-mile microwave relay from the fairgrounds at Stockton Boulevard and Broadway marked the longest remote sound and picture pickup ever attempted in this section of the country. The Sept. 6, 1954 telecast was the first in a week-long series of nightly telecasts from the fair.
The Bee also reported that the station’s original reception reached as far north as Oroville (Butte County), as far east as the Sierra Nevada, as far south as Fresno (Fresno County) and to the Pacific Ocean on the west.
And in The Union’s report, it was noted that KOVR’s test patterns determined that the station originally had strong reception in 27 California counties, including Sacramento County.
With its first airing, KOVR became Northern California’s seventh VHF station to take the air.
KOVR was originally owned and operated by Television Diablo, Inc. and that independent company’s principal stockholder and president was Les Hoffman, who was also a radio and television manufacturer.
Miller recalled Hoffman’s involvement as a television manufacturer, as follows: “His company was the manufacturer of ‘Easy-Vision’ televisions. The picture tubes in the television sets had a tinted glass that was supposed to make it easier to watch the television picture.”

While working for KCRA-TV, Bob Miller adjusts a flat on the set of the Milly Sullivan Show in about 1955. Photo courtesy of Bob Miller

While working for KCRA-TV, Bob Miller adjusts a flat on the set of the Milly Sullivan Show in about 1955. Photo courtesy of Bob Miller

In 1957, KOVR became an ABC affiliate, as it acquired that status from the capital city’s original ABC affiliate, KCCC Channel 40.
During the following year, KOVR was sold to the Gannett Company of Rochester, N.Y. Part of the arrangement of the sale was that the station’s transmitter would be moved to a location near Jackson.
KOVR was sold to Metropolitan Broadcasting (later known as Metromedia, Inc.) in February 1960, and the station’s antenna was placed on a 1,550-foot tower near Walnut Grove.
By 1962, KOVR was running its Sacramento studios at 1216 Arden Way.
KOVR began its McClatchy ownership era when McClatchy Newspapers purchased the station from Metromedia in 1964, and operated KOVR from studios in Stockton and Sacramento.
That era ended with the sale of the station to the Outlet Company of Providence, R.I. for $65 million. The agreement for the sale was announced on July 5, 1979.
In explaining the reason for the sale, McClatchy Newspapers President C.K. McClatchy, in an interview for The Bee, said, “Various recent court decisions and rulings by the Federal Communications Commission have made it clear there is increasingly strong government opposition to the ownership of television stations by newspapers in the same market. This is what led to our decision that it would be in the best interests of the community and our employees and McClatchy Newspapers to seek an orderly transfer of ownership.”
The Rockefeller Group bought the Outlet Company in 1983 for $244.8 million and assumed an $87.3 million debt. As a subsidiary of the Rockefeller Group, the Outlet Company later became known as Outlet Communications.
In explaining a portion of KOVR’s history, The Bee, in its March 13, 1986 edition, noted that “Outlet remained a part of Rockefeller until February [1986], when it split off, leaving KOVR behind, briefly.”
And The Bee added that following that split, Outlet “almost immediately” partnered with Wesray Capital Corp. to spend $625 million for the acquisition of four radio stations and seven television stations, including KOVR.
The station was once again under a different ownership in 1986, as Narragansett Capital, Inc., an investment group based in Providence, purchased it for $104 million.
But that proprietorship was fairly short lived, as Narragansett sold KOVR to Anchor Media, Inc. (later became River City Broadcasting) for $162 million on Nov. 1, 1988.
In 1995, KOVR exchanged affiliations with KXTV Channel 10, as KOVR became a CBS affiliate.
During the following year, River City Broadcasting was bought by the Sinclair Broadcast Group.
Viacom Television Stations Group (presently part of CBS Corporation) purchased KOVR for $285 million in December 2004.
Today, KOVR, which presently identifies itself as “CBS 13,” is recognized as the Sacramento market’s oldest continuously operating television station. Its offices and studios have been located at 2713 KOVR Drive in West Sacramento since 1987.
In continuing with his memories about Channel 13, Miller said, “One of our major shows was the Hoffman Hayride, which was sponsored by Hoffman Easy-Vision televisions. It was a live show once a week. It lasted an hour, and they had a lot of production numbers. Among the guests were Maddox Bros. and Rose, which in those days were popular western (music) people. ‘Cotton Seed’ Clark was the show’s emcee. We had seven or eight production numbers, with guys singing, ‘(When the) Moon Comes over the Mountain,’ (etc.). I would do sets (for the show) with lecturer’s chalk on big sheets of paper – 8 (feet) by 10 feet, with props and so on. And when I was done, I was just covered in chalk. I looked like a clown, but it was fun.”
Miller said that new employment brought him to Sacramento in 1955.
“Dick Block, who also worked at Channel 13 at that time, said, ‘Hey, I heard about a television station going on the air up in Sacramento, Channel 3. So, Dick and I came up to Sacramento – and made an appointment of course. I was interviewed by (Ewing C.) ‘Gene’ Kelly, showed him my portfolio, and that was at the corner of 11th and J (streets), above a creamery called Country Maid. I started the day the station went on the air on Sept. 3, 1955.”
Miller eventually spent a decade working as the art director for Channel 3.
While at Channel 3, he designed all the sets for the news shows, most of the commercials and all of the kiddie shows, including Skipper Stu, Boson Bill and Captain Sacto.
After leaving Channel 3, Miller began working for Fred Wade – the original Captain Sacto – at his business, Wade Advertising Agency, which handled the accounts of such businesses as KCRA-TV, KCTC 1320 AM, Crystal Cream and Butter Co., Capital Federal Savings and Loan, Suburban Ford and Rancho Murieta.
Most Sacramentans would recognize the steamboat logo for River City Bank that Miller created while he was employed by Wade.
Miller ventured into business on his own in 1977, as he established Bob Miller’s Art Department, which later became Bob Miller Associates, and is now known as Bob Miller Design.
In discussing his career as a whole, Miller said, “I think I left a legacy and helped raise the standard for design in Sacramento and that might be part of my legacy. Working as an artist and designer has been a rich, professional life. It’s been an adventurous, entertaining and fulfilling career, and I’m not done yet. I have fairly solid (artistic) commitments until 2018, so it would be irresponsible to die (before then).”

Local resident’s early love of art led to long career

Editor’s Note: This is part one in a series about local people connected to the early days of television.

While meeting with this publication last week to share details about an art show that he would be taking part in with two other artists, Carmichael area resident Bob Miller explained that his involvement in art extends beyond the strokes of brushes on canvas.
Bob, 83, noted that his background in art even included working for television stations during the 1950s.
In speaking about his longtime interest in art, Bob said, “My first memory was drawing cartoons from coloring books, doing pictures of Disney characters and so on. I was always one of the best (at drawing) in class.”
Long before becoming a television pioneer, Bob was raised in the town of Hughson, about 10 miles east of Modesto by his parents, Pierce and Mae Miller, who he mentioned were much older than himself.
“My father was born in 1886 and my mother was born in 1896,” Bob said. “My mother, I think, was in her late 30s when I was born and my father was in his 40s. They were both Pennsylvania Dutch, German, and as a matter of fact, the first language for both my mother and father was German.”
Bob, who was the fourth of five children in his family, said that his father grew up as an orphan, came West when he was in his 20s and for a short time homesteaded in Arizona.

Carmichael area resident Bob Miller has enjoyed a long career as an artist. Photo by Lance Armstrong

Carmichael area resident Bob Miller has enjoyed a long career as an artist. Photo by Lance Armstrong

In about 1912, Pierce moved to the Vermont-Slauson district of Los Angeles and opened a dairy and delivered milk.
Bob described the events that led to his parents’ marriage and the early part of their life together, as he said, “My father had apparently worked as a farmhand for my mother’s father and he had remembered my mother and went back to Pennsylvania and asked permission to marry her from her father. My mother just barely knew him, and they were married and he brought her to California. Instead of going back to Los Angeles, they settled in (Hughson).”
Despite dropping out of school when he was about 10 years old, Pierce proved to be very successful working in a variety of jobs during his life. His jobs in Hughson included working in a livery stable and operating a notable peach farm of about 40 acres.
The Millers eventually moved to the town of Empire – about five miles east of Modesto – where Bob attended Empire Grammar School (the predecessor to today’s Empire Elementary School) through the eighth grade.
In 1944, Bob began attending Modesto High School, where he was active in the art club, was student body president in 1947 and graduated a year later.
During that time, Bob, who was influenced by two art teachers, Ida Gross and Jean Ariey, was the sports cartoonist for the school newspaper.
In commenting about that experience, Bob said, “(Working as a sports cartoonist as a career) was sort of what I wanted to do. Well, that sort of thing sort of fell by the wayside.”
In 1948, Bob began attending San Jose State College (today’s San Jose State University), where he majored in commercial art, minored in history and was editor of the school’s magazine, Lyke.
During his sophomore year at San Jose State, Bob married his high school sweetheart, Anita Richardson.
While still attending that institution, Bob obtained part-time work as a sign painter.
And with his college days finally behind him, Bob was hired to work full time as a silkscreener for a Sunnyvale, Calif. firm called R and A Signs.
His employment with that company lasted about three months, at which time Bob moved to Sacramento with his family, which then included his wife and two children.
With that move, Anita was able to live closer to her parents, Raymond and Ardis Richardson, who then resided in Carmichael, near the intersection of Fair Oaks Boulevard and Marconi Avenue.
Bob’s first employment in the capital city was at The Dosch Co. at 200 V St., where he worked on silkscreen jobs and other projects.
In describing his uninviting working environment at that company, Bob said, “My silkscreen shop was an old chicken coop and it had tar paper on the roof. During the summer, it was like 120 (degrees) and during the winter, it was like 50 (degrees). There was no air conditioning, no heating, no anything like that. So, I cut stencils and old man (F. Elwood) Dosch would give me like five X-Acto blades a week and a wet stone to sharpen (the blades). It was just ridiculous.”
Although Bob is many years removed from that job, he spoke about various irritations of that workplace as if they occurred the previous day.
Among those irritations were his daily interactions with the business’s guard dogs, which were tied to a post about 10 feet from where he worked.
“One of my major jobs was there were dogs, Dobermans, that (Dosch) used at night and turned loose in the yard as guard dogs,” Bob said. “The dogs were chained to a post and it was my job to clean up their (droppings) and to feed them. Well, they hated me. All day, they would sit there and growl at me while I was cutting my stencils.”
Bob was undoubtedly thrilled to finally change jobs about a year later.
In recalling the moment that led to his new employment, Bob said, “I was home one night (in 1954) and we flipped on the television and Channel 36 in Stockton had just gone on the air. It was KTVU, and I looked at their artwork. Their artwork was absolutely miserable, so I threw my portfolio in my Studebaker and I drove down to Stockton. I was interviewed by a guy named Dave Hume, and Dick Block. Dave ultimately became the news director at Channel 3 (in Sacramento). In any event, I was interviewed by them. They really liked my portfolio, but it also meant that I was to be a floor man on television shows. Everything was live in those days. Dave said, ‘You know, I really like his (art) work, but I think he’s too short to reach the mic booms.’ And here I am, I’m going to be a floor man, I had to reach the mic booms. So, we went down in the studio, and I got down on my tippy toes and I managed to operate the mic boom and he said, ‘Okay, that’s okay.’ So, they hired me.”

Annual Effie Yeaw Bird and Breakfast event set for March 22 and 23

The American River Natural History Association (ARNHA) and Sacramento Audubon are teaming up to offer a special weekend of morning birding trips coupled with wonderful breakfast fare on Saturday, March 22 and Sunday, March 23.

This event, held at the Effie Yeaw Nature Center in Ancil Hoffman Park in Carmichael, starts with Bird Walks guided by some of our best local birders. For weeks in advance of the walks, these guides scout the Nature Study Area so they will be able to point out nests and local rarities. After the walk, you will join fellow birders for wonderful food, good coffee and other fun to help raise money for the Effie Yeaw Nature Center. No extensive birding experience is necessary-this event caters to all levels.

On Saturday, the bird walk will be approximately 90 minutes long, followed by the traditional casserole breakfast buffet provided by some of the best cooks among ARNHA Board members and Nature Center volunteers. Participants can also bid in a silent auction for attractive baskets and experiences.

On Sunday, you can choose to join either a family bird walk, a one hour walk with children 6 or over welcome, or a longer, approximately 90-minute, adult bird walk open to those ages 12 and older. The Sunday event features an excellent pancake breakfast prepared by the Carmichael Kiwanis. On Sunday, there will also be a natured-themed craft activity for children.

Mendocino-based Discount Binoculars will be available on Saturday showing a wide range of binoculars and spotting scopes. They feature more than 25 styles of binoculars and scopes, made especially for birding, for you to compare and test.

This event often sells out. Reservations are required. Call 489-4918 for information, questions and to make reservations. For more information and to reserve a spot online, visit

General admission is $40 per person age 12 to adult.

Kiddie show hosts thrilled young television viewers

Charlie Duncan, shown above in this recent photograph, replaced Mitch Agruss as Channel 13’s Cap’n Delta in November 1966. Photo by Lance Armstrong

Charlie Duncan, shown above in this recent photograph, replaced Mitch Agruss as Channel 13’s Cap’n Delta in November 1966. Photo by Lance Armstrong

Editor’s Note: This is part five in a series about Mitch Agruss and other kiddie show hosts, who brought joy to many young television viewers in the Sacramento Valley.

Mitch Agruss, who was featured in the first four parts of this series, was once described in an article in The Sacramento Bee as “the dean of Sacramento children’s show hosts.” And in tribute to other local television kiddie show hosts of the past, the following summaries are presented:
Charlie Duncan

As previously noted in this series, Agruss was known in East Sacramento and throughout the valley for his endearing presentations as Cap’n Mitch, and Cap’n Delta, “Skipper of the Valley Queen.” In November 1966, after five years of working as Cap’n Delta, Agruss resigned from that position at Channel 13, and he was replaced by Fair Oaks native and lifelong Sacramento County resident Charlie Duncan.

Duncan, who had experience reading children’s stories on the radio, was asked by Channel 13 to temporarily fill the void left by the departure of Agruss.

Duncan explained that his position as Cap’n Delta grew into a permanent role.

“I went in on an emergency basis, so I just kind of picked up Mitch’s style and interviewed kids, gave away prizes and just enjoyed myself,” Duncan said. “I loved the kids and I had no problem with them at all. I ended up (as the show’s host) for four and a half years, almost five (years).”
In 1970, Eleanor McClatchy selected Duncan, who was a graduate of Sacramento State College (today’s Sacramento State University), to serve as the curator of her historical collection. He eventually worked at the Sacramento History Center, which opened at Front and I streets in Old Sacramento in 1985.

In recalling his work for McClatchy, Duncan said, “She was very interested in history and in drama, and I was in over 30 plays at the Eaglet Theater (which operated next to the Music Circus). I just kind of stayed in touch with television for about five years, and Eleanor McClatchy wanted me to become the curator of newspapers and printing (archives). Eleanor had a tremendous collection of old newspapers and early California and Sacramento artifacts and it was my job to display them. I spent another 20 years working for her, and 42 years with KFBK and KOVR.”

Duncan, who has two sons and a daughter who were born at Sutter Memorial Hospital in East Sacramento, retired in 1995 and now resides with his wife, Shirley, in the old Arcade area of the city.

James Henry “Jim” Keating

Following Duncan’s time as Cap’n Delta on Channel 13, James Henry “Jim” Keating replaced him in that role.

Jim, a Brooklyn, N.Y. native who was a former child actor, television announcer and radio disc jockey, came to California in the early 1960s and worked for KOVR from 1967 to 1987. His Cap’n Delta tenure lasted until the show’s cancellation in 1973.

His son, who is also named Jim, recalled having the opportunity to be a guest on his father’s show.

“I was actually on the show one time,” the younger Jim said. “I believe I was about 6. I was in first grade, I think it was. When you got done, it was great. You have a TV personality who’s your dad and does a kid show, and we were kids. There was all this excitement and the prizes. You had the treasure trove. Everybody went home with something, and it wasn’t just one thing for you. It was one for you and one to share with a friend. It was fantastic. All of a sudden I was on this show, and a friend of mine went on the show after that. (Other kids would say), ‘You’re Cap’n Delta’s son.’ Well, that lasts until you’re in about the third grade, then from then on it was a little teasing. But it was like I had this idol for a dad.”

Later in his life, the eldest Jim performed in nine musicals with the Stockton Civic Theater and won three Willie Awards for his work as the best leading and supporting actor.

He was also a lead singer with the Stockton Portsmen Chorus.

The eldest Jim passed away on July 31, 2012, about a month shy of his 86th birthday.

Billie M. “Tiny” Moore

Billie M. “Tiny” Moore achieved his greatest fame as a country swing mandolinist, contributing to recordings and live performances of such musical artists as Bob Wills and Merle Haggard. But he also obtained notoriety as a kiddie show host.

During the pioneering era of television, on Channel 10, Moore became involved with a live music show called “The Ranch House Party.”

The show was cancelled after a 13-week run and Moore was asked to host a kiddie show on the station.

Moore, who was born in Hamilton County, Texas and moved to Sacramento in the early 1950s, accepted the offer and took on the role of the guardian of the trees, Ranger Roy.

Joining Moore on the show was a little monkey named Anna Banana and a donkey known as Ten Chan.

The Ranger Roy show aired from 1956 to 1960, when the program ended due to a labor dispute.

Moore’s life in music also included teaching music at Ye Music Shoppe in Town and Country Village, operating Tiny Moore Music Center at 2331 El Camino Ave., teaching group guitar lessons at the YMCA at 2228 21st St. and making college-level music instruction videos. He also won the senior division of the prestigious National Fiddle Championships in Weiser, Idaho, in the summer of 1987, and was the original choir director of the First Baptist Church in Carmichael.

Moore, who was humorously, yet affectionately known as “Tiny” due to his large size, died on stage of an apparent heart attack during a performance in Jackpot, Nev. on Dec. 15, 1987. He was 67.

Norman L. Bales

In addition to attending night classes at the McGeorge College of Law (today’s McGeorge School of Law), Norman L. Bales hosted Channel 10’s children’s television show, “Diver Dan.”

This 1960s show featured the helmeted diver, Diver Dan, played by Bales, and a school of talking marionette fish.

The set of the live show was a sunken boat known as the “Channel Tender.”
Diver Dan’s sidekick on the show was O.U. Squid, a marionette squid character that was operated from atop a ladder.

A consistent part of the show was Diver Dan’s adventures in overcoming the evil Baron Barracuda and his sidekick Trigger, a turtleneck sweater-wearing, cigarette-smoking fish character.

Bales spent 12 years on Channel 10’s staff before graduating from McGeorge, passing the state bar exam and becoming a Sacramento County public defender.

Bales, a Texas native who moved to Sacramento with his family when he was 8 years old, passed away at the age of 50 on Sept. 17, 1981 after suffering an apparent heart attack in his home.

Jesuit High School celebrating 50th anniversary

A sign announces the 1963 construction of Jesuit High School. Photo courtesy of Jesuit High School

A sign announces the 1963 construction of Jesuit High School. Photo courtesy of Jesuit High School

Carmichael’s Jesuit High School is presently celebrating a special anniversary, as it was established 50 years ago.
This half-century tradition began with 93 freshman students under the direction of the California Province of the Society of Jesus (the Jesuits) and the Rev. Joseph Keane, as superior.
The idea for the creation of this private, Catholic faith-based, all-boys school, which is located at 1200 Jacob Lane, was conceived by Bishop Robert J. Armstrong (1884-1957) during the 1950s.
Armstrong’s successor, the Rev. Joseph McGucken (1902-1983) furthered this dream through his involvement with various fundraising efforts.
Also instrumental in fundraising efforts for the school were Elwood and Jack Maleville and other Catholic lay people.
During the early 1960s, Keane was sent by the Rev. John Connolly, provincial of the California Province, to initiate the preliminary groundwork for the establishment of the school.
The efforts to establish the school took a major step forward in January 1961, when the California Province purchased a more than 20-acre portion of the old Horst hop ranch to be used as the site of this institution.
The majority of the school, which has a much larger campus today, was built in only about four months, a feat that resulted in associates of the school referring to the project as “the miracle of Sacramento.”
The first issue of Jesuit High’s newspaper, which was then known as The Plank, referred to the fast pace of the school’s construction, as follows: “The transformation, wrought by the firm of Harbison and Mahony, definitely borders on the miraculous.”
The architect for the project was Harry J. Devine and Keane served as the project’s executive director.
Following the completion of its six major buildings, Jesuit High was opened on Sept. 17, 1963. And with that opening, Jesuit High became the first new high school established by the California Province in 42 years.
The Rev. John Geiszel, who had previously served as the vice principal of Loyola High School in Los Angeles, was hired to serve as both the school’s first principal and a history teacher.
Other members of the original faculty were the student’s chaplain, the Rev. John Ferguson, theology; the Rev. Joseph Barry, mathematics; the Rev. Raymond Brannon, Latin and speech; the Rev. Carlton Whitten, English; and the school’s only lay teacher, John Maher, history and physical education.
On Sept. 26, 1963, Keane was appointed first superior of Jesuit High. His resume, at that time, included serving as a chaplain in the U.S. Navy during the Korean War, dean of men at Loyola University in Los Angeles and athletic director at the University of San Francisco.
On Nov. 6, 1963, Jesuit’s faculty and student body selected the name, Marauders, and the colors crimson and gold.
Joining Jesuit’s faculty in February 1964 was Brother Edward Johnson, who performed a variety of jobs, including working in the study hall, sorting and filing mail, cleaning the chapel, running errands and watering the lawn.
Eight months later, five priests, one brother and two laymen were added to the faculty.
The first Jesuit High sports team to compete against another school was its basketball team, which debuted in the fall of 1963.
By the spring of 1964, Jesuit fielded its first baseball team, followed by its first cross country team in the fall of 1964 and its first football team in the fall of 1965.
Today, the school features 14 sports teams and has a rich history of championship teams at the league, section, state and national level.
Clubs were a rich part of Jesuit’s early history and among the first clubs to be formed at the school were the Radio Club, the Glee Club and the Sodality service organization.
Student activities at the school have since expanded to include about 45 student-led clubs, ranging from service programs to international clubs to leadership organizations.
The school also has a long history of providing its students with opportunities to participate in visual and performing arts programs.
Another early element of the school since its beginnings was its yearbook, The Cutlass.
This annual’s original staff, which included its editor and chief Mark Warren, began meeting in February 1964.
Jesuit High School has a half-century-long tradition in the Carmichael/Sacramento area. The school was established on property that was formerly occupied by the Horst hop ranch. Photo by Lance Armstrong

Jesuit High School has a half-century-long tradition in the Carmichael/Sacramento area. The school was established on property that was formerly occupied by the Horst hop ranch. Photo by Lance Armstrong

The 1965 annual was the first edition of The Cutlass, and the book consisted of 36 pages with black and white photographs.
When the school was only about a decade old, it survived a threat of closure due to financial and manpower challenges.
A newly established board of trustees, led by James Carr, who headed the “Ad Hoc Committee to Save Jesuit High School,” took charge of the school’s finances and policy-making duties, while the Jesuit order kept its role as the school’s administrators.
The school’s growth throughout the years has included new structures, as well as increases in the size of its faculty and student body.
Today, Jesuit has a student body of about 1,000 and about 120 faculty and staff.
Many former Jesuit High students have fond memories of their time at the school.
One such person is Michael DeFazio, who was one of many members of his family to attend Jesuit.
In sharing that history, Michael said, “(His brother) Bill graduated in 1967, the first class of Jesuit, (his brother) Jim graduated in 1969, I graduated in 1970, (his brother) Tom was 1972, (his brother) Peter was 1979. I have cousins – George, Matt and Bill – that graduated from Jesuit. I have two sons, Michael and Andrew, that graduated from Jesuit in 2004 and 2007, respectively. My nephew, Robert, graduated in 2002 and his brother, Tom, graduated in 2005. His brother, Jeffrey, graduated in 2007. My brother, Tom, has a son, James, who graduated in 2003.”
Michael, who owns a medical records business, added that he has enjoyed being involved with Jesuit High throughout the years.
“It was fun (attending Jesuit),” said Michael, who had previously attended St. Ignatius School at 3245 Arden Way. “There was a lot of camaraderie. I spent so much time close to there with other siblings and then children, and all the sports with the kids. It feels like I never left.”
Bill, who owns a commercial real estate company, recalled an earlier plan for the site of Jesuit High.
“I went to St. Ignatius grammar school on Arden Way, and the Jesuit (High) School – I don’t know if they were going to call it Jesuit – it was supposed to (be constructed behind St. Ignatius). The school owned a bunch of property behind there that they designated to put the high school on. I don’t know if they determined if it probably wasn’t big enough. But going back, it was supposed to be built over behind St. Ignatius on Arden Way, and I believe the school – the Jesuits – owned the property all the way over to Morse Avenue.”
In sharing one of his earliest Jesuit High memories, Bill described a school activity that was unique to Jesuit’s original class.
“I do recall that the first class had to go out and plant the lawns in the fall of our first year,” Bill said. “Instead of P.E., probably for a week or two, the priests all got us together and we planted the lawn out in front and we planted the lawn out in between the administration building and the first classroom building.”
Bill also said that because of his love for playing sports, he assisted with the creation of the school’s first baseball field.
“I went out there with the principal at the time, Father Guisel, to help (with) the baseball (field) or what was supposed to be the baseball field. I guess there was a backstop out there. We got ahold of a tractor somehow and cleared off the infield and made it look like some kind of a place you could practice on. We didn’t have any games there, I don’t believe.”
Bill, who played on Jesuit’s first baseball, basketball and football teams, was a member of the school’s first championship baseball team in 1967.
Evan Elsberry, the award-winning chef who operates Evan’s Kitchen and Catering at 855 57th St., described a regret he has when it comes to his connection to Jesuit High.
“My regret is I didn’t stay at Jesuit,” Elsberry said. “I went to Jesuit in 1978 and 1979 (before transferring to a public high school) and there was a great sense of belonging (at Jesuit) and it was great to be there, a lot of camaraderie. There was a lot of tradition for a relatively young school.”
Elsberry said that to this day, when someone asks him where he went to high school, he will proudly tell them that he attended Jesuit High.
Greg Kaeser, who graduated from Jesuit in 1980 and now operates an accounting-related computer programming service for businesses, added, “(Jesuit) has been a big deal in a lot of people’s lives and it continues to be a great school. Certainly at a time when young kids have a lot of different challenges and things, it’s a nice constant and it’s a good touchstone for everybody. It certainly gave me a great foundation in life, and I met a lot of good people and it prepared me for college and everything else beyond that. It’s something I’ll never forget.”
And as the memories of Jesuit High continue to be special for its many former students, current Jesuit students are also creating memories that will last a lifetime, as the school heads forward into its next 50 years.

‘59 Arden Park Little League All-Stars shared memories at luncheon

Shown here is a photo of the 1959 Arden Park Little League All-Star team. Teammates recently met for a lunch reunion in the Arden area. Back row, left-to-right: Danny Segalis, Jeff Boroski, Chuck Cusack, Ric Williams, Rick Niello, Gary Foster, Eric French, Don Murphy. Front row, left-to-right: Coach Geandrot, Jack Stansfield, Jimmy Olson, Allan Davis, John Fuller, Bob Geandrot, Warren Bernoff, Coach Drennen.

Shown here is a photo of the 1959 Arden Park Little League All-Star team. Teammates recently met for a lunch reunion in the Arden area. Back row, left-to-right: Danny Segalis, Jeff Boroski, Chuck Cusack, Ric Williams, Rick Niello, Gary Foster, Eric French, Don Murphy. Front row, left-to-right: Coach Geandrot, Jack Stansfield, Jimmy Olson, Allan Davis, John Fuller, Bob Geandrot, Warren Bernoff, Coach Drennen.

It all began with an email from my friend and client Allan Davis. As I make my living in PR and advertising, I’ve been handling the publicity for the much-anticipated Milagro Centre, which he and wife Nancy are developing and which is coming soon to Carmichael.
Allan wasn’t writing me this day to talk about Milagro, however.  He had more important matters in mind…the 50-plus year reunion of his 1959 Arden Park Little League All-Star team. I was mildly intrigued, so I asked Allan for a little more info, like, how successful were they…how far did they get?” “Well, we beat Roseville and then went up and played Auburn, who beat us,” answered Davis. “That was the team that went on to the Little League World Series.”
Now, Sacramento can be a small town, especially if you have a long history here. Allan and his teammates do. So do I.  I told Allan I would submit a story to the Arden-Carmichael News if I could bring a guest. Allan, being his typical amenable self said, “Sure, who is it?” I went on to tell Allan that my former roommate played on that Auburn team that was the nightmare in their field of dreams.
We agreed we’d keep Tom’s identity a secret and reveal it at the luncheon at Piatti’s. So here’s the line-up that was present that day. Please hold your applause till the end or rattle your paper if the notion hits you.
Playing left field, retired San Juan School District teacher and administrator, Ric Williams. At catcher, Don Murphy, CEO/retired of the Optima Company. On the mound, Rick Niello, President of the Niello Company. At second base, developer Allan Davis of Milagro Properties. In centerfield, dentist Jack Stansfield. Playing 3rd base, retired administrator from the San Juan School District, Eric French.  Also in attendance at the luncheon were Steve French and George Cate. They played with these guys, but not on this particular team. The afternoon of the reunion, they were happily warming the proverbial bench.
When I explained to the team why I was crashing the party they were very welcoming. When I gave them the clue that Tom Owens, my former roomie, grew up in Auburn, he not surprisingly received a chorus of raspberries.
And then the stories started flying.
In their first outing against Roseville, the Arden Park gang had Rick Niello on the mound. Arden Park won that game, 4 to 3.
The former all-stars attribute much of their success to the fact that in summers previous they would spend long hours playing pick-up games in La Sierra Park, even creating their own sandlot league, which they dubbed “The Continental League.”
Riding high on their win over Roseville, it was on to face the Auburn Little League, home of the legendary Bob Sunada. Said Ric Williams, “He was a man-child.”  According to Owens, his teammate, “When Bob would hit one out of the park, it would go beyond the 200 feet marker in centerfield…it would sail over the pines beyond the fence…you could hear the gasps come from the visitors’ bleachers.” Said Williams, “I was shocked anybody 12 years old could hit a ball that far. It went deep into the trees.” 
In the early innings, Sunada hit a pair of those towering solo home runs, which put Auburn up by two. Arden Park’s Don Murphy hit a two-run rocket, which tied the game in the fifth inning.
One of the amazing things about the luncheon include the recollections 50 years since.  Tom Owens remembers Murphy’s blast. “It was a line drive 30 feet above the fence.” Murphy incidentally went on to play with the Detroit Tigers.
Alas, that was the final hurrah for Arden Park, as Auburn scored three more run in the bottom of the fifth, sealing the fate for the boys of summer, “Arden Park edition.”
With some melancholy Eric French recounted the experience. “It was like going to Mars to play Auburn…we’d never traveled like that…and I remember that in the days after my Dad brought out his transistor radio so that we could listen to Auburn playing in the World Series.” Added Don Murphy, “We always thought it could have been us.”
As the party was breaking up, it was reminiscent of that famous film footage of the last surviving members of the Civil War gathered together for a reunion. Handshakes and good wishes were exchanged, despite the battle wounds suffered on the diamond. Allan Davis submitted one last request. “I’d like the readers to contact the paper if they know the whereabouts of anyone else on the team not present today.” Perhaps another reunion looms. The only question: Will they invite Auburn’s Owens?

Gathering place, Milagro, coming to Carmichael

Here is a proposed drawing of the Milagro marketplace, which had a un-groundbreaking ceremony on Thursday, Nov. 7.

Here is a proposed drawing of the Milagro marketplace, which had a un-groundbreaking ceremony on Thursday, Nov. 7.

Milagro, Spanish for miracle, truly exemplifies the transformation from the disappointment that was the Hillside Center in Carmichael to the soon-to-be realized dream of two longtime Carmichael residents. The developers, husband and wife team Allan Davis and Nancy Emerson-Davis want the public to be aware their project is well past the speculation phase.

With architectural plans drawn up and design concepts in place, their Milagro Centre held un-groundbreaking ceremonies on Thursday, Nov. 7. (Milagro Centre is located on Fair Oaks Boulevard, between El Camino and Marconi.) The program included shovels decorated with the logo, Tonka truck centerpieces, chocolate shovel favors and what may have been the first lighted un-groundbreaking shovel. There were also slide shows of Milagro architectural drawings as well as various photos depicting life in Carmichael.

“We like to think outside the box at Milagro Properties, so we’re holding an un-groundbreaking,” said developer Nancy Emerson-Davis days before the event. “We will have shovels, but they’ll be pointed up to represent the direction we want to take Carmichael.”

Milagro Centre will be a gathering-place for residents of the meandering Carmichael area, offering a variety of vendors, from casual to fine dining to unique specialty shops. This culinary hub with courtyard music will be visually enriched by gardens accented by palm trees as well as an inviting fireplace, with open seating for dining and lounging throughout the center. A banquet facility for special occasions is part of the mix. The new Milagro Centre will encompass approximately 50,000 square feet of retail space, with water features and palm trees enhancing the entrance along Fair Oaks Boulevard.

Here is a proposed drawing of the Milagro marketplace, which had a un-groundbreaking ceremony on Thursday, Nov. 7.

Here is a proposed drawing of the Milagro marketplace, which had a un-groundbreaking ceremony on Thursday, Nov. 7.

“This represents a multi-million dollar investment on our part in a center that had fallen into disrepair,” said Allan Davis. “We live in the neighborhood…we love Carmichael and feel that Milagro, in the European tradition of the plaza, will be a gathering place, to generations of families from all over the area.”
Over four decades ago, famed Sacramento developer, Joe Benvenuti moved his daughter, Nancy Emerson-Davis, into a duplex he’d built in Carmichael. Now, in the tradition of the late Sacramento developer, Nancy is making great strides in the realization of her own dream project.
“47 years ago, I wondered what I was doing in Carmichael, and now, in reflection, why I’ve made it my home. When I sip my first glass of wine at Milagro Centre, I’ll realize the ‘why’ and tip a glass to my father and thank him for the opportunity given to me. I want Carmichael to be to me what Sacramento was to him,” said Nancy Emerson-Davis.

“Carmichael’s main street, Fair Oaks Boulevard, is being revitalized by both public and private investment. Sacramento County transformed the intersection of Fair Oaks and Marconi Avenue with improved landscaping featuring towering palm trees. Soon after, private investment followed north on Fair Oaks Boulevard. Now Milagro Centre is breaking ground south of the intersection and will create an attractive destination featuring retail shopping and restaurant amenities. I applaud the vision being presented by Milagro Investments,” Susan Peters, Sacramento County Supervisor said.

Businesses, residents to join together to beautify Carmichael

Cathryn Snow, who serves as a director of the Carmichael Chamber of Commerce, said that her idea to establish Carmichael Community Pride Day was well received. Photo by Lance Armstrong

Cathryn Snow, who serves as a director of the Carmichael Chamber of Commerce, said that her idea to establish Carmichael Community Pride Day was well received. Photo by Lance Armstrong

This Saturday, Oct. 26 will be a special day for Carmichael, as local businesses and residents will participate in the inaugural Carmichael Community Pride Day.
Sponsored by Sacramento County Supervisor Susan Peters, the Carmichael Chamber of Commerce and the Sacramento County Department of Transportation, the event was organized to encourage businesses and residents to improve the appearances of local properties. The three-hour event will be held simultaneously with the Fair Oaks Boulevard Brush Up, which is presented three times per year.
Pride Day participants can either work on their own properties or can arrive at the Carmichael Park tennis courts at 5750 Grant Ave. at 8 a.m. to be assigned to a particular project. Volunteers should wear gloves and comfortable shoes, and can donate paint brushes and supplies to the project.
Carmichael area resident Cathryn Snow said that the idea for establishing the workday came during her visit to a Roseville shopping center about two months ago.
“I was sitting out at the Fountains in Roseville and enjoying what a beautiful place that is and thinking, ‘Gee, I wish that we had something like that in Carmichael,’” Snow said. “What I see there anytime that I’m there is that the parking lots are full and there are all kinds of people roaming around. People are comfortable and walking slowly. They’re in and out of businesses and all of the businesses there are busy. What we really want to create is that welcoming feeling in Carmichael. We have that wonderful community spirit in Carmichael, but we want to enhance the businesses and draw more business into Carmichael.
“I’m a director for the (Carmichael) Chamber (of Commerce), and so I took (the idea) to the board and asked what they thought about it, and I told them I would be willing to chair that if they would support it. They were unanimously in favor of that. From there, we put together a diverse committee of people who I thought could help bring that (project) about.”
The committee consists of Howard Schmidt, Jack Harrison, Fred Rivas, Patrick Carpenter, Jim Schubert, Chris Meyer, Linda Melody and Tarry Smith.
Snow described the group as “one of those dream committees (with people who) say, ‘I can do this and I can do that.’”
For instance, Schubert, who serves as the county’s senior landscape architect, and Rivas, owner of the Lawnman landscape company, have volunteered their time to assist local businesses with landscaping suggestions.
In describing the community workday, Snow said, “The purpose (of the project) is to encourage business owners, primarily, to landscape and maintain, paint; generally make their businesses more attractive, so that it attracts more businesses into Carmichael. Sometimes I think people choose to go somewhere else, because it’s more pleasing in comparison to something like the Fountains. What we’re asking – on Oct. 26 in the morning from 8 to 11 (a.m.), or whatever time they choose, but our formal time is 8 to 11 – is that businesses and homeowners clean up their properties, make them more attractive. A lot of businesses have existing planter boxes and so forth, garden areas. They already have established areas, but that has gone to seed or it hasn’t been planted for years, it’s full of weeds or there’s just nothing going on in it. And then planting trees and bushes. You can get free trees from SMUD. Their tree alliance provides free trees. So, why wouldn’t you do this? The cost that you have other than the initial purchasing of the plants is water. That’s it. And we can suggest very drought tolerant plants.
“A lot of the (workday) will be centered around the park facilities. There will be some painting of backstops and picnic tables and doorways, and general cleanup. And, of course, there is always trash pickup here, there and everywhere. It’s also the other parks in the Carmichael park district that can certainly always use weed pulling and trimming and everything.”
Snow added that the project is satisfying in that it had always been the goal of Peters and of the chamber to improve the business climate in Carmichael, as well as to bring more business into Carmichael.
Furthermore, Snow praised the Fair Oaks Boulevard corridor project for bringing improvements to Carmichael.
“We’re just kind of piggybacking on that (project),” Snow said.
Snow added that the community response has been great.
“When I called all of these service clubs and scouts and everything, their immediate response was ‘Yes, absolutely count us in.’ There was not any hesitation whatsoever. And Susan Peters was very happy about it.”
Participating in this weekend’s event will be the Kiwanis Club of Carmichael, Carmichael Elks Lodge No. 2103, the Rotary Club of Carmichael, Mission Oaks Recreation and Park District, Arcade Creek Recreation and Park District, St. John The Evangelist School, Soroptimist International of Sacramento North, local Boy Scout and Girl Scout troops and Carmichael Creek, Carmichael Colony and Barrett Hills neighborhood associations.
From a personal standpoint, Snow understands the magnitude that improved landscaping can provide in terms of bettering the success of a business.
“My background is real estate,” Snow said. “I had 23 years in real estate and what I know is that people are drawn to the attractiveness. That’s the first thing. We always say in real estate, the first 10 seconds are most important, and that’s the time that it takes people to get out of their car and walk up to the front door.”
Melody, who serves as the executive director of the Carmichael Chamber of Commerce, spoke about the effect such a project can have on the community.
“I think an event like this is important, in fact, actually to do on a yearly basis where the whole community takes part,” Melody said. “I know there has been some concerns with trash thrown around or weeds growing and I think that it’s not something that just one person can do or a few people. When a community comes together and takes pride in their own community and helps to make it look better, I think it’s a place that they can then be proud of. So, that’s why the chamber is apart of this and we were able to get community organizations and groups to take part, because I think everybody cares about what their community looks like and is willing to do their part.”
In encouraging the community to participate in the event, Snow said, “This (project) will greatly improve the landscape in Carmichael, as well as earn service hours for schools. Everyone is welcome to take part.”
For additional information, contact Linda Melody at the Carmichael Chamber of Commerce at (916) 481-1002 or Cathryn Snow at (916) 804-7687.

Chautauqua Playhouse presents ‘Camping with Henry and Tom’

(L) Michael Beckett, Jerold McFatter, Daryl Petrig, Chris Lamb

(L) Michael Beckett, Jerold McFatter, Daryl Petrig, Chris Lamb

Chautauqua Playhouse continues its 37th season with their production of “”Camping with Henry and Tom” by Mark St. Germain. The show runs on Fridays and Saturdays at 8 p.m. and Sundays at 2 p.m. through Nov. 17. The performances are held at the Chautauqua Playhouse, 5325 Engle Road in the La Sierra Community Center in Carmichael. Admission is $19 general and $17 students, seniors, children and SARTA members. Please note that this production contains strong language.

In 1921, Henry Ford, Thomas Edison and President Warren G. Harding took a camping trip together into the Maryland woods to escape civilization; what they couldn’t escape was each other. Inspired by an actual event, “Camping with Henry and Tom” is an exploration of friendship, politics and leadership; it’s a comedic and dramatic clash of two great minds and one great heart of the 20th century.

The production is directed by Janice Reade Hoberg with set design by Mel Caines. Lighting design is by Don Myers. The cast Daryl Petrig, Michael Beckett, Chris Lamb and Jerold McFatter.

Information and tickets are available through the Chautauqua Playhouse website: or call the box office at 489-7529, during business hours.

The Spyglass

They say that confidence is a color that doesn’t run. So here goes with our second Spyglass column. Big thanks to all our readers who responded with favorable reviews and comments to our debut piece.
Let’s stick with the good news–for now…
The flame of civic virtue continues to burn bright in Arden. Richard Frank, CFP, whose office–Edward Jones Investments–occupies a certain sweet spot in Lyon Village (view of the lovely fountain, proximity to Miyagi Restaurant, etc.) reports that he has volunteered as a facilitator in his Lion’s Club’s drive to collect children’s backpacks. The project involves filling them with school supplies and food for needy schoolchildren. He has informed us that Virginia McNeely at Trinity Cathedral is looking for individuals or companies to donate drab-colored backpacks for the children of Floyd School, a Title 1 school near 5th Street and Broadway, Sacramento. Surely someone in Arden or Carmichael has some corporate logo day packs simply gathering dust somewhere around the house or garage. Give Virginia a call at 916-446-2513…
August 2013 has been mercifully–and un-characteristically–un-hot. That’s a good thing. A bad thing was the spell of triple-digit temps we had a while back in early July. Talking to Julie Sardia, the manager of Savemart in Loehmann’s Plaza, we learned that several freezer compartments conked out after closing time with no one responding to the alarm. Out to the dumpster next morning went some fifteen-thousand dollars’ worth of microwavable dinners. A few weeks later, some milk cooling units failed due to the heat. Fortunately, the company was insured for the loss…

Not so fortunate was one area doctor, Albert Z. Owens, MD. His heat wave story goes like this: the night porter blows a fuse while vacuuming his hallway. The office refrigerator goes negative function all night. Total loss–a fortune in flu vaccines and insulin. Insurance only covers ten thousand dollars! Landlord refuses to take responsibility for the balance. Hearing this, we thought a little medical humor might cheer him up. “That’s funny, Doc.” we told him. “Funny as reverse peristalsis!”

Any good negligence lawyers out there?

We always thought that petitions were circulated by volunteers, fired-up individuals for some political or social organization. Not so any more. One can simply hire a company to collect signatures nowadays. So how about a petition to install a stoplight across from Sierra Fair and Warren Oaks Apartments? Over eight hundred people live in these facilities, including many children who dash across Fair Oaks Boulevard to the plaza, as well as seniors and the disabled whose dashing days are history. Herein lies a worthy cause or project for a local well-heeled sponsor to take up.
Don’t all raise your hands at once…

And here’s a little Internet Age love story we happened upon: Charles Richards (not his real last name) of Carmichael, by way of North Carolina, informed us that he was headed to San Francisco to meet up for the first time with a high school sweetheart he hadn’t heard from in forty years. They hooked up again on the Web, contacted each other, discovered that they were both free and, having each acquired a ton of money, were just right for fanning the eternal flame which flickered long ago. Should be an interesting tale, which will of course be relayed in this column upon his return. That is unless…well, we wish these former “tar heels” the best in their meet-up, whatever happens…
Update: We hear it did go well and Charles is headed back for more…stay tuned!

We’re still in shock at the news of the sudden passing of our friend Brian Miller, manager of Noodles & Company in Loehmann’s Plaza. We were all set to have an encore of last year’s appearance of the El Camino High School Band in a spirited concert in front of the restaurant. Maybe that will still happen, as a tribute to a fine citizen and neighbor who will be sorely missed. He leaves a wife and two children, and as his boss Mark recently said, “Wherever he is, they’re lucky to have him. I’ll have a hard time finding a replacement for Brian. He was that good.”

As the Sisters of Mercy used to tell us in grammar school, “Pray for the repose of his soul.”

We had some happy news to relate about our neighbor, octogenarian Dorothy, in our last column. Not so now, regretably to say. No sooner had she returned to the welcoming bosom of our fine Arden neighborhood than her van was stripped of its spare tire. So bold was the thieving, two-legged trash that they returned the next night to relieve the vehicle of the mounting bracket for the spare.
And not content with that, they stole her blue handicapped parking placard as well! We were not amused hearing this.
“Durn low-down varmints!”, as old cowboy Gabby Hayes used to say in Roy Rogers radio days…

Sadly, the weed of crime seems to be thriving everywhere one looks in our times. “Wild West” redux? As the great novelist F. Scott Fitzgerald might have written had he lived to witness the present age, “So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past–OMG, lol, yada, yada, yada.”